- The Travel Blogger
Traveling the world full time. Maintains an active blog along with a corresponding Facebook fan page and a twitter account. Recurring topics on the blog include: the surprise friendliness of locals over their Western counterparts, reasons as to why you too can travel like me, and how to not get robbed abroad. Eventually gets robbed in broad daylight in a very friendly city in Latin America. Notifies everyone via every social media then writes a long blog post detailing the ordeal.
- The Travel Photographer
Buys the latest Canon SLR for $2000 along with $5000 lens. Loves to travel to places where the aforementioned sum can pay a worker for several years of labor. Takes pictures of every single old town square, church, and dog shit on the sidewalks that he or she sees. Thinks that not a single person on the Internet has seen that particular old town square, church or dog shit on the sidewalks before. Sometimes runs it through a Photoshop filter which lightens the colors, or gives it a more “vintage” effect. Usually ends up getting robbed in places like Peru, Ecuador or Brazil losing all the gear.
- The Pickup Artist (PUA)
Views seduction of women as a discrete series of steps that must be carefully executed in order to reach the final level: procreation. Views the world in black and white consisting of alphas and betas. Usually has a blog where he boasts how many “approaches” he did and discusses strategies to a successful “date 2” or “kiss close”.
Compensates for extreme celibacy of earlier years by preaching being an “approach machine” or approaching every woman in sight – that is unless you want to be considered a lesser man (beta). Sometimes takes a philosophical approach by debating the pros and cons of “direct” or “indirect” approach.
- The Minimalist
Believes that the absolute key to life’s happiness is the ability to store one’s possessions in a suitcase or a backpack. Has a blog where he boasts how having less things and no permanent place of living is “liberating”. Loves to post pictures of himself sitting on a mattress (real or air) while working on a Macbook Air in an empty room.
- The Location Independent
Considers himself a trailblazer because he/she has an online business and is able to travel the world while making money. Constantly boasts what a great lifestyle this is and how everyone should be doing it. Usually sells an E-Book on his site that details how you too can have this dream lifestyle. Talks in buzzwords such as “passive income” or running a “muse”. Has no attachment to a particular country or place but loves to keep moving around only to reinforce the inherent “freedom” that this lifestyle duly provides.
- The Tim Ferriss Groupie
Experienced a life-changing event after reading The Four Hour Workweek. Can be found on Tim’s blog leaving comments such as ‘Awesome post Tim!’ or ‘Well played, Tim!’ Loves to jerk off to self-help money-making blogs all day long but is too cool to put in the sweat for his own business and be soul-crushed when, god forbid, it may take more than four hours per week. Imagines himself on a Caribbean beach somewhere working on a laptop four or less hours per week while making thousands of dollars per month. Wants to outsource his whole life but doesn’t know where to start. Favorite buzzwords are “information diet” and “mini retirement.”
- The Facebook Traveler
Always carries a smartphone with him with an international data plan. Views life is a series of Facebook “check-ins” after arriving to a new city or country. Loves airport layovers because they give him a chance to checkin while en-route to another city. Given the choice of making the check-in and making his flight, he would probably choose the former. Would probably not travel if it weren’t for Facebook and the ability to show off in front of hundreds of your closest “friends”.
- The Armchair Traveler
Rarely, if ever, sets his foot outside his native city but knows perfectly what things are like in other countries thanks to mostly second-hand accounts such as the Internet, friends, social networking sites, media, etc. Has a strong opinion of foreign lands and will not yield any argument to anyone — especially to those that have lived in places of question. Favorite pastime is lecturing people who’ve lived in these places what it’s really like to live there and how dangerous they are.
- The Vicarious Traveler
Does not travel due to due lack of time, lack of passport or the most common condition: ghastly fear of the unknown. Religiously reads every single travel blog on the Internet for clues on what other countries are like. Favorite questions usually asked in the comments are: “Is it dangerous” or “What’s it like?” Digs deeper with very important objective questions such as: What’s your favorite country? Do you like Brazil or Italy better? Always affirms his desire to start travelling but never really makes it happen.
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